When a show airs 121 episodes, some storylines are bound to drop the ball so in honor of the 10 year anniversary of Gossip Girl, I’m ranking the 10 most ridiculous storylines to hit the show. Let the absurdity begin.
10. Marcus and Catherine’s Storyline – Marcus and his stepmother Catherine make an appearance at the start of season 2. Marcus is dating Blair while the much older Catherine is enjoying a fling with Nate. It doesn’t take long for things to take a really creepy turn as Vanessa catches Catherine hooking up with her stepson. This is a sign that the show, even in season 2, was getting a bit more soapy and focusing less on character dynamics that worked really well during the first season. It’s the first sign of a creative slump that would pop up from here and there throughout the series.
9. Serena, Eric, and Their Cousin Charlie Share the Same Father – In season five, we learn that Serena and Eric’s father had an affair with Carol Rhodes, Lily’s sister, and fathered a child with her, their cousin Charlie. At this point, Gossip Girl was already well on its way to becoming a soap opera, but still. Was this drama really necessary or was it just gratuitous? Season 5 is probably the most absurd of all the seasons and this storyline is the main reason for that distinction.
8. Rufus and Lily’s Long Lost Child – The storyline involving Rufus and Lily’s long-lost son Scott was totally ridiculous, but a soap opera can never be complete without at least one couple having a secret love child. Considering how complicated Lily and Rufus’ relationship and family life was, Scott wasn’t really needed. Again, it was just unnecessary drama that added nothing to the overall story. And seeing that he never made another appearance after season three, it’s obvious how inconsequential Scott’s storyline was. At least this one was a one and done.
7. Dan Hooking Up with His Teacher – This storyline makes the cut for pure laziness. A student hooking up with a teacher has been seen before and if you’re going to do it again, it must be interesting. This just wasn’t. I guess it was to show Dan was less of a “Lonely Boy” in season 2 but it lacked real punch to actually work or make me care.
6. William Pretending That Lily Still Has Cancer – When Serena and Eric’s father, William van der Woodsen, entered the picture in season three and pretended that Lily still had cancer so he could keep her close to him, it was pretty obvious that the writers were just looking to create more drama. The whole situation is pretty disturbing – even for Gossip Girl. Also, the fact the he stayed on the show long after this really baffles my mind but I guess any act can be brushed aside.
5. The Whole College/Young Professional Thing – So much focus was put on the characters on Gossip Girl going to college; however, after only a couple of seasons of them being in college, they’re suddenly all accomplished young professionals, moving forward in their careers with wild success. For example, Nate takes the media world by storm and becomes the Editor-in-Chief at the New York Spectator while Blair is the head of Waldorf Designs. No entry level jobs for these folks! That’s for people who don’t grow up on the Upper East Side.
4. Blair’s Relationship With The Prince Of Monaco – None of us believed for a second that Blair would end up with Louis Grimaldi, Prince of Monaco, because she was obviously meant to be with Chuck. So, the fact she spent nearly two seasons in a romance with Louis was really annoying. Everything about this alleged romance was totally ridiculous, from the pregnancy to the contract and to the dowry. Granted, these characters live in a heightened reality where this maybe could happen but it still seemed a bit over the top.
3. Chuck’s Estranged Mother – Like most other things on the show, Chuck and his alleged mother Elizabeth’s storylines were over the top and a bit ridiculous. First, she was believed to be dead. Then, during season three, she was suddenly alive. At the end of season three, they end up estranged after she tells him that she’s not his mother. In season five, Chuck learns that Diana Payne – who was sleeping with his best friend Nate – is his real mother. Then, yet again, this turns out to be false. Elizabeth is, in fact, his real mother, but who would remember that given how convoluted the story became?
2. Anything Involving Jenny – During season one, Jenny wasn’t so bad. She was kind of annoying, but at least her storylines were moderately interesting. After season one though, Jenny became insufferable and the storylines involving her character became ridiculous. From dropping out of school to pursue a career in fashion to becoming Queen Bee at Constance to her obsession with Nate. By the end, she was a constantly screwing with other people’s relationships. It didn’t matter whether it was Nate and Serena or Blair and Chuck. She had absolutely no compunction and we wish that they had written her off at the end of season one.
- Dan Being Gossip Girl – Dan as Gossip Girl does not make sense. When this was revealed in the last episode of the series, most viewers couldn’t help but scoff. He was way too much an outsider to know all that inside information, especially during season one, and he never proved himself to be that much of a sociopath throughout the series. It was obvious that the writers didn’t plan this and were obviously looking to tie up the series up as quickly as possible.
Editor’s Note: Keep checking back today and tomorrow, September 19th, for more Gossip Girl as we continue our tribute to our favorite Upper East Siders.
